Wednesday 14 April 2010

EFFECTIVE WAYS TO STRENGTHEN YOUR RELATIONSHIP


Hi! everyone,

As the world is becoming more and more integrated, no man can live on his own. Therefore, integration and staying well connected become crucial and important in our lives. To be successful, you need to maintain good and lasting relationship with others. You can only grow further through this healthy relationship

1. Respecting each other is an absolutely fundamental pillar in establishing good relationship. This means that we have to accept who they are; caring and loving them for their uniqueness and differences. However, many people expect others to conform in ways they deem appropriate. This is more inclined to slavery than love! Bear in mind that others are not neither your private property, nor your slave. Needless to say, it is not conducive for you to have a happy relationship when you restrict their freedom by treating them in the above manner. Most human beings may want to grow in ways, not to your liking or your comfort,  but preventing their growth will stifle both you and them. Instead of restricting others' freedom, it is far better to encourage them to grow and become the persons they want to be. Indeed, the only way that can assure a person can  flourish is through true love.

2. None of us is perfect. Therefore to have successful relationships with others, we need to tolerate each other's imperfectness. Understanding others will help us to see things from their perspective, and not from ours. Through this, we will not only become wiser, but  will also reduce conflicts through better understanding of each other. This means tolerance will serve to maintain harmony and strengthen relationship. We must be aware that every one has his own belief, culture, liking and preferences. Therefore you need more than love to build a long lasting relationship. Without tolerance and compromise, there will be no true relationship. Extra care is required especially in the multi-racial environment. True harmony will not be achieve if any particular race remains more superior than the others because it acts against the profound human principle of equality. Good and sound relation will not take place if  there is no true acceptance of each other and no true equality in that sense. These will create hatred due to lack of trust among them.

3. Argument is the worst way to spoil relationship, if left unchecked, because the tendency is for the person is to win and to be right. So, watch out for this DEADLY trait. Argumentative people have a great tendency to argue until they "win" about everything and anything. They will not listen and consider others' viewpoints. This is because they are rarely compromise. You must bear in mind that any criticism, however fair and justified will be met with opposition. Therefore, it is wise to not indulge in silly futile arguments. Remember that winning arguments is not the objective, but what is more important is to establish truly good and lasting relationship.

4. Listening and learning are required. Relation is build through understanding  each other. As such, you need to listen and learn from others so as to avoid conflict. This serve as a double edge sword that can cut both sides. To ensure lasting and healthy relations, we cannot lack these skills. Without these, there is no true understanding.  We need to polish our listening and learning skill for us to grow beyond our personal capabilities.

5. Open minded. A fundamental prerequisite for learning is an open mind. No one can learn without doing so. The undeniable truth is that who we are is what we believe in. The things we believe control our lives. We pass judgment based on our beliefs and we perceive things from our own belief windows. How can we see others' perspectives if we are restricted by our own beliefs?  To accept change and new idea, we need to change our core belief that allow us to open our heart to listen to the new idea. Without doing so, there is no way we can acquire new ideas because our belief has rejected them in the first place prior to listening.

I challenge you to give the above serious thought and I hope that the proven recipes will not only assist you in strengthening your relationship with others, but also ensure that you enjoy long lasting happiness and a deeper loving bond.

Please do voice out your thoughts via comments so as we can enrich our discussion. Thank you in advance for your kind participation.

Wish you a success,

James Oh

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